We spent the last six chapters talking about the best foods to feed your children, but ultimately, it is simple: Kids need to be deeply and fully nourished. When they eat fresh, whole, living foods (whether plants or animals) grown in fertile soil with mineral-rich water, they can support their physiology and development, and put some in reserve for when challenges come along. These foods can include the following:
YOUR SHOPPING LIST
Fats
Butter**
Coconut oil*
Flax oil*
Ghee**
Grapeseed oil*
Hemp oil*
Lard**
Olive oil*
Schmaltz**
Sesame oil*
Sunflower seed oil*
Tallow**
Tree nut oils like walnut, macadamia, hazelnut*
*Unrefined, cold pressed, and organic
**From pastured animals
Seasonings
Annatto
Apple cider vinegar
Black or green cumin
Black pepper
Cayenne
Cilantro
Gemasio
Herbamare
Kelp
Oregano
Organic wheat-free tamari or nama shoyu (soy sauce)
Paprika
Rosemary
Sage
Sea salt
Thyme
Turmeric
Umeboshi plum vinegar
Make a Spice Station
Set up your spices in a visible place in your kitchen. Get your children involved in making meals by asking them to pick out seasonings that look interesting to them. Even if they’re just asking for “the red one” or “the green stuff,” it’s a great way to pique their curiosity about new flavors. Turmeric contains curcumin, one of the most powerful antioxidants and anti-inflammatories known.1 Black cumin seed has been shown to effectively treat everything from asthma to seizures to cancer.2,3,4 The Koran even refers to it as “the cure for everything except death.” Cayenne helps with pain syndromes.5 Rosemary has such powerful aromatic phytochemicals that simply inhaling its aroma boosts memory.6 Spice up your food!
Teas
Alfalfa
Chamomile
Ginger
Green
Hibiscus
Lemon balm
Licorice
Linden
Oatstraw
Passionflower
Peppermint
Red clover
Rooibos
Rosehip
Skullcap
Tulsi
Whole foods
Fruits and vegetables from the entire color spectrum (organic or biodynamic when possible)
Pastured, organic meats
Pastured, organic eggs
Pastured, organic dairy
Seeds, nuts, grains, and beans (sprouted)
Raw honey, maple syrup, date sugar
A small selection of minimally processed foods to use for snacks, packed lunches, etc.
The Superfood Myth
People always ask me which “superfoods” I recommend, expecting me to name exotic foods like goji berries, acai juice, or yacon. My take? All foods raised in a responsible, nutrient-dense way possess characteristics associated with superfood. To qualify as a superfood, your body has to really love it and want to change for the better as a result. Dandelion is a perfect example. Nutrient-dense and bitter, it’s good for the gut and the microbiome; the gallbladder, the liver, and detoxification; and blood sugar stabilization. It helps flush the kidneys and reduce the pain response. It’s a powerful antioxidant and it helps fight cancer.7 You can eat all of the parts: flower, leaves, and root. And dandelions grow everywhere, so you can gather them . . . for free!
There’s no need to travel to the corners of the world to find “magic food.” Your superfoods may be growing wild in your backyard, hiding under a rotting log in the forest, stocked at your farmer’s market or CSA, munching on lush grasses in not-so-distant pastures or laid that day by foraging hens in your own backyard! Fresh, whole foods have superpowers when grown in the way nature intended, exposed to the elements—sunshine, high-mineral water, rich soil, bugs, worms, and the whole crew of miracle workers above- and belowground. I point patients to specific foods to emphasize particular healing benefits, but it’s best to enjoy a wide array of nutrient-dense foods for the diverse “superpowers” they offer.
Here’s a snapshot of the healing journey and the foods that aid it:
1. Empty the basin: Remove allergens and food toxins as possible, as well as factory-farmed food and industrial chemicals. Drink clean water.
2. Heal the gut: Introduce therapeutic remedies such as bone broths infused with astragalus; aloe gel; bitters; teas such as chamomile, licorice, or fennel; soups; sauerkraut; and kefir.
3. Balance the immune system: Enhance vitality with maitake, reishi, and other mushrooms; ginger, teas such as red clover and alfalfa, and spices such as turmeric and black cumin seed. Homemade goat milk yogurts (if dairy is applicable) are helpful, too.
4. Detoxify: Help the body cleanse its systems with foods such as organic dandelion root tea or young dandelion greens, cabbage, stinging nettles (handle with care or you will be stung!), artichokes, raspberries and other berries, beets, and the whole color spectrum of fruits and vegetables.
5. Nourish the cells with nutritive teas, soaked and sprouted nuts and seeds, sprouted grains, cacao or chocolate, some pastured meat, tallow/lard/schmaltz/duck fat, coconut oil, squash, and sweet potato.
6. Regulate neurological function with remedies that calm, such as passionflower and lemon balm tea, that promote focus like green tea, and that enhance brain plasticity like brassicas (kale, Brussels sprouts, broccoli sprouts, cabbage). Offer diverse healthy fats.
GROCERY SHOPPING
I recommend you limit your grocery store shopping to those foods that you can’t get from a farm or farmer’s market (more on this in a bit), such as dried goods and other pantry staples. Here’s what to keep in mind when you go:
• Don’t bring your kids: Grocery stores are no places for children. Supermarkets—and the food companies represented there—strategically set traps to capture your child’s attention. From packaging (cartoon characters and celebrities) to product placement (the shelves at a child’s eye level are prime real estate) to checkout line displays of candy while you stand there with nowhere to go. If you can—and I realize it’s not always up to you—leave the kids at home.
• Read labels: Trying to corral your kid at the store makes it very difficult to focus on what’s written on a food label. It takes the utmost concentration, even for the most experienced parent. Remember, labels are difficult to read on purpose.
• Look out for these red flags:
1. MSG: hydrolyzed anything (yeast, vegetable protein, soy protein, etc.), autolyzed anything, anything “caseinate,” natural flavors (sometimes)
2. Aspartame or other artificial sweeteners: NutraSweet, saccharine, Splenda
3. Food dyes: anything FD&C, yellow or red number anything, any color
4. Preservatives: science lab words. Things you don’t see on the list of ingredients in cookbooks or can barely pronounce.
5. High-fructose corn syrup: corn syrup, corn sugar
6. Partially hydrogenated fat: cottonseed oil, soy oil, corn oil, canola oil, “vegetable” oil
Meal Planning
With reasonable advance planning, you can employ these principles without turning your life upside down.
• Start seasonal: What delicious ingredients are available right now in the season and place where you live? I wouldn’t choose to eat fresh tomatoes in the cold Northeast during December; I’d choose a dish that features meats or root vegetables with dark, leafy kale. On the other hand, in summer, my family rejoices in the abundance of organic heirloom tomato varieties available at the farmer’s market (or from our own garden!) that we fit into as many recipes as possible for the short months of tomato season. Arrange meals around what is freshly picked, whether from the garden, store, farmer’s market, or CSA. Consider Google your friend for coming up with recipe ideas. When we first joined a CSA 12 years ago, kale and Napa cabbage rotted in my crisper because I had no idea how to prepare them. Now, I hop online for inspiration. Adjust your cooking style to the seasons, too. Think about hearty soups and Crock-Pot meals in the winter and salads or grilled veggies in the summer.
• Love your leftovers: Make the most of dinner prep by making slightly more food than you normally would and stretching those leftovers over the course of the week. If we’ve had roast chicken on Sunday, I’ll make leftover chicken thighs into a potpie, and the carcass into slow-cooked soup with veggies and spices. I might skim some of the fat off the top and use it to flavor veggies. Throwing a meal in the Crock-Pot before leaving in the morning means dinner can be ready by the time you’re home from a busy day. A little leftover broth might become the cooking liquid for a pot of grains. Those grains can then become the base for taco night along with some black beans, spices, salsa, and chopped veggies. Freezing surplus also stretches leftovers.
• Think about ingredients: Because I cook from scratch, I consider the foundations of a meal as I shop. Produce, including dried fruit, whole grains, meat/fish, eggs/dairy, oils, nuts/seeds/beans, spices, fats. With these components—and my easy recipes—meal options are limitless.
• Limit processed foods: Our processed food supply is restricted mainly to crackers made with seeds, occasional gluten-free or sourdough breads, and rare treats like organic tortilla chips, plantain chips, or small-batch sorbet or ice cream.
FARMER’S MARKETS AND CSAs
I call farmer’s markets my “natural Prozac” because I always leave happier than I arrived. I connect with growers and food-makers, take in the fragrant fresh vegetables and herbs, vivid fruits, mushrooms, eggs, and meats, as well as the carefully crafted cheeses, decadent jams, and other goods. Freshly picked produce smells and tastes fantastic as opposed to what you buy in stores, which has been bred to look handsome, uniform, and last for weeks.
Do take your children to farmer’s markets instead of supermarkets. Explore together. Say hello to the farmers and ask questions about their work as well as their growing practices. Take samples of foods. See what your kids like. Give them a “farmer’s market allowance” and let them make decisions about what to buy for the week. Create parameters: One thing they’ve had before and liked, one thing they’ve never had before that they are interested in trying, and, of course, a treat.
NOTE: Most farmer’s markets have specific requirements about how far the food can travel and what can be sold. Beware of imitations, i.e., “farm stands” that get their produce from the same suppliers as the grocery stores but sell it along the road or at a fruit stand.
Community Support Agriculture (CSA) is a model where individuals support a local farm for the whole growing season in exchange for boxes of the farm’s weekly harvest. It’s a subscription for super-fresh food. CSAs can offer fruits and vegetables, eggs, meat, even dazzling flowers. To find a CSA program near you, go to http://www.localharvest.org/csa/ and type in your zip code.
OTHER SOURCES FOR GOOD FOOD
Foraging
A weed is a plant whose virtues have not yet been discovered.
—RALPH WALDO EMERSON
In unsprayed areas, such as (hopefully) your own lawn—or untamed areas—look for dandelion leaves, flowers, and roots. We forage in our yard for rose hips, plantain leaves, wood sorrel, or lamb’s-quarter. Learn what’s around you and get the phytonutrient boost of wild food on nature’s tab. Always positively identify what you are eating. Books such as The Forager’s Harvest (Samuel Thayer) and Edible Wild Plants (John Kallas) are good guides.
Grow Your Own!
Start a plot in your backyard or in a community garden, using Seed Savers’ heirloom seeds for a punch of flavor and nutrition, or cuttings from friends or local nurseries. Start by “building” soil by adding compost (which can be bought or made from your own food waste and yard scraps). Plant seeds or seedlings and see what happens. Check out Chapter 16 for much more information on this, as growing your own food is one of the best ways to reap the health benefits from spending time outdoors.
If you don’t have outdoor space to plant, grow herbs and greens on your windowsill, balcony, or roof. We have grown tomatoes, basil, mint, and a small avocado tree along with a worm compost bin in our New York City apartment. It can be a little messy, but it’s worth it when you see your kids’ excitement as they watch the seeds sprout, the leaves unfold from the stalks, and eventually pick their very own harvest.
FEEDING YOUR FAMILY WHEN NOT EVERYONE EATS EVERYTHING
Dealing with Food Sensitivities
To address my family’s sensitivities, I’ve cooked meals that are gluten/corn/soy/dairy/citrus-free. It sounds extreme, but it is really not that difficult. We’ve never had a shortage of foods that everyone can eat and enjoy. Most guests in our home gush over our food without ever knowing that they are eating “free-from” food. We have plenty to choose from: meat or fish, beans, veggies in all forms, most fruits, rice, potatoes, quinoa, and other nongluten grains.
While the learning curve can be steep when cooking for food-allergic or food-sensitive kids, shopping and cooking become second nature after the initial transition.
Anyone can cook; no training is necessary. Making meals for a family requires only basic ingredients, basic equipment, some simple tried-and-true recipes, and—every once in a while—flights of imagination. Cooking at home started as a necessity for my husband and me; as doctors in training with kids and little income, we didn’t have money to eat out or buy prepared foods. Once we detected our son’s soy allergy and discovered that nearly every restaurant used partially hydrogenated soybean oil in its food—which could trigger a weeklong episode of breathing difficulties and missed work—cooking was the only option.
With a couple of good knives, a cast-iron skillet, and a few stainless-steel pots, you can prepare delicious recipes. Gadgets are fun but completely optional.
Fun Gadgets: Getting the Best Bang for Your Buck
Slow cooker: For bone broths and one-pot meals that cook all day while you’re working or otherwise occupied.
High-speed blender: Expensive, but worth it for all of the ways it makes homemade food tasty and easy. They can last for more than a decade. Make smoothies, homemade frozen yogurt, soups, and nut butters, and grind wheatberries to make fresh flour. Think Vitamix or Blendtec.
Dehydrator: Preserve your harvest of fruit and veggies at the height of the season, or make inexpensive homemade kale chips or healthy fruit roll-ups from actual fruit!
SodaStream: To make your own fun fizzy beverages at home.
Food processor: A major time-saver for quick slicing and dicing of veggies or fruit.
MORE REASONS COOKING IS GOOD FOR YOUR FAMILY
It Is Healthier . . . Physically
In a study comparing those who cooked dinner to those who ate out, researchers found that young people who eat home-cooked food eat more healthfully. They consumed significantly more fiber, fewer carbohydrates and calories, and less salt and sugar.
It Is Healthier . . . Emotionally
University of Michigan researchers found that the amount of time kids spend eating meals together at home is the single biggest predictor of academic achievement and fewer behavioral problems—more important than time spent in school, studying, attending religious services, or playing sports.8 Wow. More frequent family meals increased the odds of a child’s positive social skills and engagement in school and decreased the likelihood of problematic social behaviors.9
It Saves Money
For the same amount of money (or less) that you spend on take-out, you’ll get better-quality food when you cook at home. Unless you seek out restaurants that share a philosophy of quality, organic food fresh from the farm—and thankfully there are more of these than there used to be—you are likely eating monocrops, factory-farmed meat, and partially hydrogenated oil, all for a higher price than if you’d purchased far better ingredients yourself.
Tips for Starting a Family Meal Practice
• Start slowly. If your family is not used to eating together, start by planning one or two family meals in a week. Sit down together for a family meal, homemade or otherwise. A weekly favorite take-out meal may first bring everyone together, unplugged. Gradually increase until you have at least one family meal every day. If this is impossible because you or your partner work late or your kids are enrolled in sports or other activities, then try for breakfast, or even a special weekend snack. If that’s impossible, it may be time to reprioritize activities.
• Sit with your children. Your physical presence matters. Be together at the table where you can make eye contact with your child. Ask your child what is happening in his life and encourage him to share by recounting things—serious or silly—that happened during his day.
• Unplug. No phones, TV, iPads, Nooks, Kindles, and whatever else I’m forgetting. Not for kids, not for parents. This is not easy. There are days I find this very difficult, especially if something important is going on with a patient or I’m exhausted and want to check out after a long day. But your brain needs a break as much as your kids need you to be present. No books or newspapers either, unless you are using those as a way to be together.
• Keep it positive. Make mealtime a refuge from the demands of the day for both you and your kids. Try to avoid criticizing table manners or nagging at the table. Share positive things that have happened, or interesting things you are considering. Maybe talk about plans for something fun for the family to do together. Tell jokes. Paradoxically, sometimes the most difficult or secretive kids open up when they have a low-pressure venue to share with the family and are not put on the spot.
• Include activities to keep kids emotionally engaged if needed. This can range from the corny—playing telephone, spelling bees, mental math—to more edgy choices if you have tweens or teens. Some kids love to be read to. I used to read Harry Potter at the table (each character with a different voice and accent), which made everyone look forward to hearing me sound ridiculous!
• Ignore family protests. Tell your kids this: “I love you and it is important to me that we spend some time together each day enjoying food.” Stay neutral, don’t get angry, and be present. Remember, you are the rock for your kids, who are going through all the tumult of their days.
• Ask everyone to help prepare the meal. Assigning (or better yet, accepting volunteers for) various tasks means that everyone plays a role. Cooking will be quicker, and children like to eat what they helped plan and prepare. With advance notice, some teens really enjoy preparing a special meal—they like to be trusted and enjoy the good feedback, and you don’t have to cook. Win-win! Don’t forget to clean up as a team as well.
• Create special family meals or rituals for certain nights or once a month. Make homemade pizza together. Taco night. Salad bar night with an ice cream bar for dessert. Do a taste-test night: make three different salad dressings or smoothies and find out which one people like most. See if they can guess ingredients. Let one child plan an entire surprise meal once a month and help shop for the secret ingredients. Be his or her sous-chef.
• Invite other friends or family over for some meals. Most kids (though not all) enjoy festive meals. Invite guests to make the experience more compelling. No screen time still applies!
INTRODUCING NEW FOODS
I know that getting your children to eat beneficial foods isn’t as simple as preparing them and setting them on the table. I first introduced kale to my very picky three-year-old son, knowing he liked spinach and broccoli, but that kale could be tougher and more bitter. When he said he didn’t want it, I casually told him he would have to eat just two bites, and if he didn’t want to eat more, he needn’t. He took a cautious bite and looked at me. “I like it this much,” he said, holding his fingers about one inch apart. “Okay,” I said neutrally, turning my focus back to my plate. Next thing I knew, he had eaten all the kale on his plate. He became a kale proponent, making up games like, “Which do you like better: juicy kale or kale soup with vegetables?” It isn’t always this easy, but keep in mind that most kids eventually come around. Here are a few rules for helping your child enjoy different foods:
Rule One: Start early. Though it’s never too late to change, new studies show that our early food preferences, particularly for fruits and vegetables (or conversely, sugary snacks and drinks), begin in the first year of life. And they can be long-lasting. Infants who preferred healthy foods were found to still enjoy them at six years old.10
Rule Two: Let your child surprise you. Don’t preemptively yuck your kid’s yum. Parents often tell me, “It’s never going to happen” about foods I recommend . . . before their kid ever tries them. Consider: At least 50 percent of parents in my practice are sure their children won’t take it. Guess what? Ninety-nine percent of kids prescribed fish oil take fish oil successfully. I have patients who beg for their bitter tonic!
Rule Three: Have a positive attitude. Overcome whatever trepidation, anxiety, or dislike you have for certain food. Many parents confess to me that they themselves don’t like vegetables. Join your child on this adventure and get excited to try some delicious new foods.
Rule Four: Teach your child about being adventurous and brave. For a child who doesn’t want to try something, frame it as an adventure into new, exciting frontiers. If he or she is worried about the experience, talk about how being brave means doing something even though it’s difficult. Tell them you’re proud of them when they try new things.
Rule Five: “Not everything has to be your favorite.” Sometimes good enough is fine. We’ve given kids the impression that every morsel of food must be absolutely delicious to them. But that’s not always going to be the case.
CHILD: Ugh, I don’t want X.
ME: I’m sorry to hear that. Did you like last night’s dinner?
CHILD: Yes.
ME: What about the night before?
CHILD: Yes, make-your-own-tacos are my favorite!
ME: Great! Well, I’m sorry that X is not your favorite. But not everything has to be your favorite. Eat what you can, and hopefully tomorrow will be yummier for you.
Rule Six: Be a badass. Feeding children is primal—it embodies deep meaning for us as caretakers. Being positive is important, but you also have to stand your ground. This is difficult for a lot of parents, but it pays off in the long run.
Rule Seven: Offer foods again and again (and again). Studies have shown that it can take as many as 20 to 30 tries to get a child to accept a new taste. Not to mention tastes change—one month’s yes is another month’s no. Often parents say to me: “I stopped sending vegetables or fruit to school with my child because they just came home untouched.” My response? “If you don’t send it, they can’t eat vegetables or fruit.” Don’t stop offering!
Rule Eight: “Hunger is the best sauce.” Ma from Laura Ingalls Wilder’s Little House on the Prairie said it best. There’s nothing like hunger to make a kid warm to a new food. I put out veggies—raw or cooked—while I prepare dinner. As the smells of food waft through the house, hungry kids pop by the kitchen to grab whatever’s handy. That platter of broccoli sautéed with garlic may well disappear by dinnertime. I used to be annoyed that my kids ate all the vegetables before dinner . . . until I realized “MY KIDS JUST ATE ALL THE VEGETABLES!” As a solution, I made more vegetables. Win-win.
Rule Nine: Don’t make food a battle. When offering new dishes, begin by including a food you know your picky child will eat. You can’t force-feed your child and you don’t want this to become a control issue. It doesn’t mean that they get breakfast cereal or PB and J every night for dinner, though—if they choose not to eat a given meal, they can wait for the next meal.
Rule Ten: Don’t take your children’s eating personally. Maybe you made a delicious dinner after a long day’s work and they only ate the rice. Maybe they only picked at your smiley face omelet with zucchini for eyes and a red pepper smile. It’s not a personal rejection of your love or your value as a parent. It sucks to put out that kind of effort and get a “meh” in return, but avoid giving up, feeling hurt, or spitting accusatory comments like “You never eat healthy food” or “You can eat fast food every night for all I care.”
Rule Eleven: Make one meal for the family. I am a working parent who makes a fresh gluten-free, dairy-free, soy-free dinner for her food-allergic family every night. I am not, however, a short-order cook. I make one nutritious and delicious (I’m told) meal for everyone, and frankly, I’m done for. Yet parents tell me about the different meals (yes, entire meals!) they prepare for each kid in the house and then another for themselves! The best way to get kids involved in new foods—and to preserve your sanity—is to make dinner for everyone . . . once.
Rule Twelve: Phase in new foods. Sometimes an enthusiastic parent will leave my office and do a complete makeover of the family kitchen within 24 hours. Then they come back having given up, despondent that no one was on board with the switch. These changes are important and positive. But food is a doorway to a deeper place for many people—comfort, pleasure, attachment, wanting to be loved, to look good, and even confidence in the ability to provide. So telling your partner that you’ve thrown away everything in the kitchen, or telling your kids that they can’t eat any of the foods they love anymore may invite more pushback than necessary. Start by talking about it. Then replace foods incrementally. Replace fast-food French fries with homemade ones, or eventually mix it up with sweet potato fries. Rotate old favorites with new dishes. Replace pasta with whole grains like sprouted rice or quinoa, cereal with slow-cooked oatmeal, instant ramen with chicken soup plus slippery mung-bean noodles. Slow and steady wins the race.
TROUBLESHOOTING: SCHOOL LUNCHES, HEALTHY SNACKS, AND NAVIGATING “JUNK TRAPS”
Keeping Snacks Healthy
We used to eat regular crackers. Then we transitioned to rice crackers, then to really funky, tasty crackers made mostly out of seeds. Sometimes it clicks immediately, and sometimes it’s a process—unless your child is ill and needs a more dramatic change right now, you have some leeway. Tackling snacks can be difficult, especially if your kids crave the processed stuff. You can start out small, replacing Doritos with organic tortilla chips, then maybe plantain chips. Packaged cookies may lead to homemade cookies or maple-coated nuts. Here are some suggestions for navigating snack time:
• Buy lots of fresh fruits and vegetables that kids like: Berries, melon, carrots, celery, apples, cucumbers, grape tomatoes, pears, snap peas, mangoes, kiwi, grapes, even kohlrabi and turnips are kid-friendly foods. Make sure they are all ready for eating (for example, cube melons, slice carrots). Silly things like using a crinkle-cutter can make a difference for a picky eater. I know a little girl who was compelled to eat all sorts of vegetables because they looked “fancy.” If your kids like pickles, a quick and dirty way to get veggies into them is to cram slices of raw turnips, beets, carrots, and other root veggies into your pickle jar with just the leftover juice. Let it sit for a week and then you have a jar of delicious pickled veggies for snacks and condiments.
• Just add dips: Cultured cream cheese, hummus, bean dip, nut or seed butter, homemade jam can all elevate a fruit, vegetable, or cracker. My kids sometimes like just a spoonful of almond, hazelnut, or sunflower butter.
• Make snacks available any time of day: Keep healthy snack foods in a specific place in the fridge or pantry so your kids can help themselves whenever they’re hungry.
• Other snacks to have on hand: hard-boiled eggs, cheese cubes, yogurt (buy plain and add fruit, honey, nuts, cinnamon, etc.), nuts, seeds, granola, dried fruit, chickpeas.
Other Ways to Make Snacks More Fun
• Drizzle fruit with a little raw honey.
• Serve frozen yogurt with a big bowl of berries, nuts, granola, dark chocolate chips, and shredded coconut.
• Make-your-own smoothie bar with different frozen and fresh fruits and veggies, along with some cocoa, cinnamon, nutmeg, lemon and orange rind, coconut water, almond milk, kefir, etc.
When Junk Happens
Sometimes I hear this from families: Johnny refuses everything except red Popsicles. Question: “Does Johnny earn money, go to the store, and buy red Popsicles? If the answer is no, remember you can control the “junk” that’s entering your house. (Though admittedly this requires both parents to be on the same page.) That said, sometimes junk happens. When my daughter was seven, she attended a friend’s birthday party. At pickup, the mom commented (smugly) that my daughter had gorged herself on candy to the point of near vomiting. My response? “That’s fine. Now she’ll know how it feels when she eats too much candy.” Indeed, my daughter volunteered afterward that she had eaten too much candy and felt sick.
You and your kids will always be presented with situations where there’s a lot of unhealthy food being dangled in front of you. Here’s how I cope:
• Bring your own treats: When we’ll be in places with a high likelihood of junk, I always bring a bag with some “acceptable” treats, i.e., additive-free items—seaweed snacks, plantain or potato chips, all kinds of dark chocolate treats (chocolate-coated nuts, ginger, raisins, etc.), maple candy, honey straws, dye- and corn syrup–free lollipops, fruit leather made from real fruit, homemade almond macaroons, or ginger chews.
• Offer swaps: Halloween, birthdays, celebrations at school—it seems that we use any excuse to flood children with candy. I’ve heard of well-heeled schools that have regular “lollipop” or “ice cream days” to make school seem more “fun” (rather than including more time outdoors, more hands-on activities, less homework). To help sweeten the deal for kids forking over their booty to you, offer something in exchange. Forgo homework for a day, instead, bake something homemade together, go somewhere special together.
• Another tactic, especially on Halloween, is to let your child pick some candies from the mix. With the remainder:
Trade some for additive-free options you can live with.
Trade for money: each candy for a penny, nickel, dime, or quarter.
Leave them as an offering for the “candy fairy” in exchange for a small surprise trinket and sparkles under their pillow.
Build something out of candy. I’ve seen kids design really creative edifices to admire instead of eat.
Perform experiments with candy: What happens if you soak it in water? Vinegar? How long does it take the dye to diffuse?
SCHOOL LUNCH
School lunch has become the front line of the battle for healthy food. And it makes sense when you consider why and how schools started feeding kids to begin with.
Children used to walk home from school to eat a “hot lunch,” and then return. But modern public schools—modeled after factories—began exploring “feeding programs” after social scientists, nutrition experts, government researchers, welfare groups, parent/teacher organizers, and ladies’ charity leagues wanted to end nutritional inadequacies among school-age children. Parents were informed of the connection between diet and academic achievement, hot school lunches were organized and served, and legislation ensued. As school lunches caught on, so did corporate food-service outsourcing, and, ultimately, the debate over “good school lunch.” And while nutritionists, parents, school boards, and corporations debate, most kids are provided with awful lunches (as in, pizza counts as a vegetable).
Corporations—who lobby to supply food to millions of children—serve lunches of processed food for profit. Yet this issue doesn’t always blip on parents’ radars. I know parents who are incredibly particular about what their children eat, what they wear, who they play with, and what they read, but when I ask what they eat at school they just say, “school lunch.”
But health, behavior, or learning issues that result from eating processed, chemical-laden junk during the day follows your child home. Consider this: Surrendering school lunch to junk is like losing five full meals a week (sometimes ten if school breakfast is included) to corporations with little interest in your children’s well-being.
Let’s also talk about when children are eating and how much time they have to do so. As schools have grown but cafeteria space hasn’t, lunch begins as early as 9:30 in the morning. Teens may have been at school since 7 a.m., but since teachers forbid students from eating in classes later, kids are forced to push through on cortisol to survive the day.
Lunchtime was once an hour long. Now, lunchtime can be only 30 minutes, so children—even younger ones—have to put away their books, get to a cafeteria, obtain food, eat, clean up, and return to class all in 30 minutes! My children often came home with their lunch half-eaten because they “didn’t have time to eat.” Figure in a few stolen moments of socializing and some kids come home starving with a full lunchbox.
A study conducted by the Johns Hopkins School of Public Health found that these factors meant children ate healthier foods:
1. Quieter cafeterias (outside is great for this) or an alternative quiet lunchroom for those who prefer it
2. Food cut into pieces (apple slices, carrot sticks, etc.)
3. Longer lunch periods, especially with recess tacked on the end
4. Teachers or adults eating lunch in the same cafeteria
PACK YOUR OWN
Preparing parts of lunch for kids the night before saves time and means your family will eat healthier meals.
Rotate new foods until you have a sense of what your children enjoy. Again, it’s okay that not everything you serve will be a favorite, and it may take several tries before foods come home eaten. But don’t give up. The goal is not to pressure kids to eat foods they don’t want, but to get them excited about the food so they’ll try it. If you stop sending vegetables because they come home uneaten, you’re ensuring your child won’t eat veggies. Instead, get creative.
Brainstorm
Salad: Veggies and chicken/meat strips, taco ingredients, nuts and seeds, cheese, sliced hard-boiled eggs, salmon candy
Rice bowl: Sprouted rice, quinoa, or other grain with beans, seeds, or nuts, poached egg, fish or meat, and assorted veggies with a tasty dressing
Frittata or quiche
Chili: Veggie or meat (some grated sweet potato builds great texture and flavor)
Veggie sushi: Nori stuffed with brown rice or quinoa, avocado, and other veggies
Snacks: Cut veggies with dip (hummus, cultured cream cheese, bean dips), fruit, plantain chips, kale chips, seaweed (best from Atlantic sources)
Treats: Dark chocolate, maple candy, honey and cinnamon–coated nuts, almond macaroons, chocolate-covered coconut, chocolate mousse, pumpkin custard
Leftovers from dinner: Best and easiest lunch ever!
Other Supplies
Use a metal tiffin lunchbox to avoid plastics and reduce waste
Wax paper bags instead of plastic
Klean Kanteen water bottles or thermoses for tea or soup
Notes with inspirational or quirky quotes, cartoons, and wacky sketches go a long way!
MEALS AT A GLANCE: YOUR CHEAT SHEET FOR HEALTHY EATING
Breakfast:
• Eggs. Any form! Poached, scrambled with veggies, hard-boiled (great for storing in the fridge and grabbing for on-the-go).
• Oatmeal. Steel-cut is best, thickly cut is next best—best soaked with a bit of yogurt then slow-cooked overnight in a Crock-Pot. Bob’s Red Mill makes gluten-free oats, which most but not all GF kids tolerate.
• Sourdough or GF French toast. You can make this in advance and freeze, then stick it in a toaster during morning rush time.
• Sourdough pancakes or waffles (gluten-free options are available). Prepare the batter in advance and store in the fridge for up to one week. Serve with cut-up veggies.
*Don’t get stuck on “breakfast”: Breakfast doesn’t have to include traditional breakfast foods. I know kids who eat steak or soup for breakfast. For example, a traditional breakfast in Colombia is bone broth and hot chocolate!
Lunch:
• Dinner leftovers (my favorite!)
• Cheese and veggies
• Sprouted hummus or bean dip with veggies and seed crackers
• Soup or chili in a thermos
• Salad with cheese, egg, meat, or beans (send dressing on the side if your child doesn’t like soggy lettuce)
• Melted cheese on sourdough toast
*Make sure to rotate through some fun add-ins:
• chocolate-covered nuts, seeds, or fruit
• seaweed snacks
• plantain chips
• homemade cookies or muffins
• square of dark chocolate, plain or with mint
• crystallized ginger (it’s spicy but some kids love it)
• maple candy
Dinner:
• Chili
• Make-your-own-tacos (or taco salad)
• Burritos with high-quality sprouted tortillas plus cheese, sour cream, beans or meat, mushrooms, onions, lettuce, tomatoes, salsa. Some kids love pickled jalapeños.
• Hearty soups, for instance, bone broth chicken soup with chunks of chicken, a bit of ginger, and tons of cut-up veggies, or a thick lentil or split pea with salad on the side and sourdough bread for dipping. Puree soups for kids who are prone to pick out the veggies, and remember that adding a touch of cream (even coconut cream can work) to carrot or squash soup can make the difference between turned-up noses and full bellies.
• Meat sauce and sautéed veggies served over sprouted quinoa
• Frittata with sautéed veggies, with or without cheese
• Marinated chicken breast with sweet potato fries and garlic sautéed broccoli
• Greens such as kale, collards, Swiss chard, bok choy in olive oil or schmaltz with garlic and salt or with a splash of umeboshi vinegar
• Carrots, zucchini, leeks sautéed in olive oil or butter
*Mix it up. Breakfast for dinner is always fun
*At every meal: Always include at least one vegetable (or two) along with a fruit. Cut them up for your child. Remember: Studies show that bite-sizing produce increases the likelihood of kids eating them.
Snacks:
• Sprouted nuts or seeds, including those baked with a bit of maple syrup or honey, or spices
• Roasted kale chips
• Cut-up fruits and veggies with drizzles or dips
• Smoothies made with fruits and veggies
• Plantain chips, or fried green or sweet plantains
Drinks:
• Water
• Homemade tea (iced or warm) with or without a touch of sweetener or milk
• Homemade lemonade sweetened with maple syrup
• Hot cacao drink with almond (or other) milk and a spoonful of blackstrap molasses
Sample Menu
Day One
• Breakfast: sourdough French toast with cinnamon, maple syrup, a fruit and veggie, tea
• Snack: carrot sticks with dip and nuts
• Lunch: squash-and-lentil stew with quinoa, cut veggies and fruits, plantain chips, some dark chocolate–covered almonds
• Dinner: chicken with olives, honey, and garlic; black cumin quinoa; salad
Day Two
• Breakfast: Crock-Pot oatmeal with fresh berries, sliced veggies
• Lunch: baked potato covered with cheese and sautéed veggies, cut veggies and fruits, a coconut macaroon, kale chips
• Dinner: make-your-own taco salad with guacamole, beans, cheese, salsa, and spices
Day Three
• Breakfast: eggs with sautéed onions and veggies, salsa on the side
• Lunch: rice and beans mixed with sautéed veggies, organic tortilla chips and salsa, cut-up fruits and veggies, a square of dark chocolate
• Dinner: roast chicken with veggies left in timed oven, squash pie, cabbage salad
Day Four
• Breakfast: boneless sardines or mackerel in olive oil with a splash of umeboshi vinegar, seed crackers, cut veggies and fruits
• Lunch: slices of leftover grass-fed roast with quinoa and greens, cut veggies and fruits, dried mango, sprouted sunflower and pumpkin seeds mixed with dark chocolate chips
• Dinner: chicken potpie with veggies, sautéed kale on side
Day Five
• Breakfast: smoothie of fruits mixed with yogurt or with a scoop of almond butter plus water, cut veggies
• Lunch: chopped salad with bite-sized veggies and sliced hard-boiled eggs, roasted salty nuts and seeds to sprinkle over top, blue potato chips, chocolate-covered ginger or fruits
• Dinner: bone broth or mushroom-based soup with hearty veggies, yucca, and millet
Day Six
• Breakfast: fried egg, red cabbage sauerkraut, cut veggies
• Lunch: hummus with carrots and other veggies, seed crackers, roasted and salted seaweed, cut fruits, pumpkin custard
• Dinner: ground beef chili (with carrots, celery, peppers, and grated sweet potato), quinoa, Brussels sprouts
Day Seven
• Breakfast: sourdough or sprouted toast with almond butter and raw honey, fruits and veggies
• Lunch: rice or quinoa bowl with tons of veggies and fixings (including sliced chicken or beef, nuts, spices), bliss balls
• Dinner: veggie frittata, salad, sweet potato fries